Wendy and Lorraine Montsho’s love story: The steamy affair

This is not an episode of Friends; it’s Wendy and Lorraine Montsho’s love story

The meeting 

Wendy: We met at work in January 2018. I remember seeing this short person whom I instantly liked. The first time I laid eyes on Lorraine, I knew I was in love — I fell in love with a stranger, even though I was still married to my ex-husband. I had this feeling about Lorraine that I couldn’t explain and I thank God it’s still there six years later. 

Lorraine: I wasn’t looking at Wendy like that — I wasn’t even aware that she was eyeing me. When she confessed her love, I wasn’t buying it. I didn’t believe what she was telling me because I too was in a relationship.

The dating life

Wendy: After we had worked together on a project, Lorraine had to go back to her base. The first week, I felt like I was missing an element in my life. I then asked her to meet me for lunch. That night, I sent her a text telling her how I felt.

Lorraine was so shocked, but I didn’t expect her to do anything about it. The unfortunate part was that she and I had to work closely again. On 15 March 2018, we started dating in secret. Two months later I moved out of my marriage home.

Lorraine: It was not easy dating Wendy because I had to lie to my partner about having to do overtime at work. Wendy and I went about secretly spending time together and dating for two and a half years, until I called it quits with my ex. I was depressed because of work and my relationship was toxic. I realised that I should be with someone who loves and respects me. The separation was easy, we didn’t fight — I wasn’t aware that my then partner was also unhappy in our relationship.

The proposal 

Lorraine: Wendy decided to propose to me on my birthday in August 2021 — clearly, I was taking too long to pop the question. We went to Cape Town and she took me out to dinner.

Little did I know she had organised with the manager and waiters at the restaurant to hide the ring in one of the dishes. I wasn’t feeling well and wanted to go back to our hotel room, but she insisted I eat my dessert. I didn’t want to disappoint her and dug in… as I looked at my plate I saw “Will you marry me?” written on it. 

Things immediately got tense because I wanted to be the one to ask her. I was also trying to heal from my previous relationship. I then declined her proposal and felt super bad. Going back to the hotel was awkward; even my friends told me I was wrong. I apologised and then, as time went by, I got the strength to propose to her. It was on 25 December 2021. 

Wendy: Lorraine’s proposal was different from mine. I remember not getting anything from Lorraine when we were exchanging gifts at my friend’s place in December, but I was okay with that. My friend then told me that Lorraine was calling me to come inside. I saw her standing with a ring in her hand, but she didn’t kneel. She yelled “Surprise” and then gave me the ring. I gave it back to her to put in on my ring finger.

Lobola negotiations 

Wendy: Lorraine decided she was sending her uncle. It was very tricky for both families because it was their first time experiencing something like this. The one family was saying “This one needs to pay for lobola” while the other felt the same. Then Lorraine said she wanted me to be her wife and that settled the whole debate. They came and paid lobola and I never paid. 

I couldn’t care less what some of my family members said. Some thought I was going through a phase because of my divorce, but I told them the only time I’d gone through a phase was when I’d acted straight and got married to a man. I was hiding my sexuality just to please my parents. I was even prepared to go to Home Affairs and sign if my parents weren’t planning on giving me their blessing. I am not bisexual; I was just in the closet, hiding who I am.

The white wedding 

Wendy: Our plan was to get married in 2023 but because of the type of wedding we wanted, we had to wait until March this year. We had an all-black wedding at Ayana Country Lodge in De Deur, Vaal.

We had it at night and it looked like something from a romantic movie. I was so happy that day, especially when I walked down the aisle seeing that beautiful set-up — I had butterflies in my stomach when I saw who was standing at the altar. As talkative as I am, I was lost for words the whole time. Lorraine, who’s the introvert in this relationship, had more of a great time. I could tell that she too wanted this marriage and I wasn’t forcing her. 

Lorraine: Our wedding day turned out quite amazing, even though the catering company we hired disappointed us and didn’t give us what we’d expected. I was happy to see all our loved ones together, celebrating us on our special day.

The wedding dress 

Wendy: It was tailored by Let’s Tailor by Amos Sithole. I was very specific about what I wanted. I chose a plain, elegant design because of my height. It was silk. I had three dresses in total.

The suit

Lorraine: I went with a sharp black suit, also tailored by Amos. I wanted it to be different from those of the groomsmen. I had two — one for the reception and the other for the ceremony. However, the showstoppers were my shoes: everyone kept talking about how dope they looked.